ok think of it like jelly beans. if you can learn to like the licorice ones, youll always have lots of them because no one else wants them. its the same with fat chicks
i wish i could just chop off my fat with a knife..i would rather endure that than work out
i wanted to sleep on a waterbed so i filled up my bathtub so i could fall asleep in it...
we watched a tutorial on how to do guidette makeup
no dont talk to me..because of you my bar tab was more expensive than my hospital bill
I just made an agreement with this milf to shoot her daughters wedding in exchange for blow jobs. Going pro was the best choice I ever made.
he said he was going grocery shopping but when he came back all he had was a jumbo bag of pancake mix and case of beer.
the essentials, lol
And thanks to you I'm pretty sure I'm banned from every qdoba in south carolina. And cab company
What did you two do last night and why did Sam send me a picture of your dick?
I'm currently deliberating if I'm going to be too drunk on New Years to handle wearing false eyelashes.
Just Peed in a cup for my country. Fighting the good fight.
What I'm doing now is like me taking a bagel, dropping it butter side down, leaving it for six years, picking it back up, and trying to fuck it
bitch dont make me pour hotsauce in your vagina
Can I get my morals surgically removed?
Last night was fun but it wasn't right. I will say that our lives intersected for a brief and intense moment and we will just leave it there.
Randomize
