Would it be weird if I brought slabs of bacon with me to the beach?
my orientation roommate looks just like New York of Flavor Flav fame
Wtf. Who made this Big Mac, Helen Keller?
doooooooo herrrrrrrrr
I'm out of practice. be my yoda
put your penis in her you must.
she's just sitting in a corner ripping all of the filters off her menthols
Farmville is her only friend.
I can't believe I paid your booty call for a ride home in cake.
Her mom walked into the garage as we were smoking a kush blunt with sombreros on.
After some trial and error I found soaking my balls in maple syurip helps ease the pain.
He wants me to hook up with his fiance while he watches. Text you later with how it goes.
Hey my vagina is like a company. Everyone has an equal opportunity....
Turns out the bartender I fucked is the bar owner. WHY THE FUCK DO I PAY FOR HALF MY DRINKS? IS SEX NOT TIP ENOUGH?
I just have to point out that once I typed "fa" my phone filled in "fatass"
It's been 12 hours since I have heard from you and social media has given me no indication you are anything but dead, so that's what I'm going with.
Butt Stuff 2016 unites us all
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