i think my mom watched the whole time
I'm totally counting that party when he kept putting his hands down my pants as a date.
Have u ever been so drunk that pissing urself felt like a better idea than walking to the bathroom? I entered those waters last night
dude she was so drunk she thought Jim Joyce made the right call
Get out here. Doing shots with the delivery guy. Also, the food is here
Found him fucking some random drunk chick in the bathrrom at the blue lep with a beer in each hand. had to give him props.
I JUST FOUND AN INTERNATIONAL POLE DANCING CHAMPIONSHIP IN SPANISH
I got back and Katie was asleep holding a burrito. I woke her up and she ate it and passed back out.
I stopped his blowjob to raise 3 fingers & whistle the hunger games tune to the people walking past the window
Paige is home safe.
Actually, she's here now, punching me in the face. You should've kept her keys.
Odd start to the day - the FBI just showed up at my apartment.
I feel a little uneasy about having my grandma sleep in my bed that I've banged chicks in not too long ago... Fuckin blizzards
I felt I lost my designated buddy on a field trip when you wandered off to get high with strangers.
Dude I may be rolling but there's no way I can make up a 12 ft tall giant green man waving to me right now
False alarm, security just told me it's a radio tower
You turned down sex for fried cheese??
My penis and doctor won't be happy with me, but come on. Fried cheese!
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