I need help removing her.
Stop everything. They have oreo straws to drink milk with and then you eat the straw. I think i just got turned on by a cookie commercial.
the cops didnt even say happy birthday to me :(
I just encountered the most annoying guy on the planet. I wanted to slap his milkshake out of his fat-boy hands while he was talking to me at the same time as slurping his liquid fat.
I love milkshakes.
Not the point.
I need to remember that good judgment goes out the window after the 7th shot and the 3rd Lady GaGa song.
ive come to the point where weve hung out more times sober than drunk. i think im growing up. fuck.
Just coerced a Santa to buy me a handle. Tis the season.
wanna play who's drunker? I just made macaroni & cheese taco and offered it to the pizza Guy as a tip.
Its a good night to get drunk in my onesie.
yeah its nbd she just bit me in the face. be there soon
i sent you a picture of beads you send me a picture of boobs how hard is this to understand
I need to throw up and die. The order doesn't matter. I feel like shit
DR UNK TOWN USA
TEAM USA GO AMERICA
Of the two of us, which one has licked a drag queen's tit in the past 5 days?
If there's anything my liberal arts education has taught me, it's belligerence.
Randomize
