Do you think people stop being hipsters when they're naked? because that's what my research shows.
Both he AND his 17 year old son were hitting on me... I'm bridging generational gaps
I just used a coupon while buying plan B. The pregnant sales clerk nodded in approval.
Still can't believe they give people like us a drivers license and college degree.
oh come on since when have relationships been boundary lines for us
fair point
I'm mumbling to people and trying not to accidentally shit my pants
You rubbed your penis on my leg and said "people have paid for this kind of action"
Love is....waiting for your girl to throw up her shot in the bathroom...then handing her her beer. Game face.
He straight up just had me drive all the way here and when I got here he was drinking a cup of tea and right after said he needed to go to bed
your vagina must have magic restorative powers I feel rested and powerful this morning.
You proceeded to get into a playground school bus and yell "all aboard to Margaritaville!"
I think there's a problem with society when I'm shopping for lingerie and I think "man some of these would make kickass shirts"
Rigtt?!
just reached the point where my breast implants paid from themselves in free drinks.
What's clit gel and why is it in my wallet.
just saw two mice fucking on our bed...i think its time to find a new place to live
Randomize
