i scrubbed and i scrubbed and i scrubbed and i still was a whore
The douche that always wears spandex at the gym just walked into class with a dick going into his mouth drawn on his face. The professor said "rough night" and he still has no idea. Tyring to get a pic
drunk...on the white house tour...security is staring. this will not end well.
Like that girl needs to get her shit together. For her vagina's sake.
Just to save you guys the surprise, somebody shit outside of our door.
I woke up in your car in the McDonalds parking lot. What the hell happened to 'no man left behind'?
This isnt meant to be as creepy as it sounds, but do you seriously want a lock of the hair I cut off?
Dont care what i do tnt just as long as i get to chug a beer in somebodys face
Day drinking is so dangerous way too many construction workers out there to flirt with
No, supporting your unemployed boyfriend IS NOT what credit cards are for.
As if I wouldn't steal Nintendo brand "Mario is my HOMEBOY!" boxers when he gave me the entire drawer to choose from.
He asked me what I wanted for Christmas. I told him an orgasm would be nice.
I came so hard I literally levitated off the top of his dick. Gravity was no match for that orgasm!
Well shit I mean if you get a bunch of cashed up drunk lesbians together in a casino, it's bound to go south at some point
There's nothing like a guy talking about your vagina as if it's delicious food to make your day better.
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