found a new level of pathetic. i watched a guy pick out cigarette butts from a jar that weren't completely finished. make sure you go somewhere in life.
I just saw a girl walking up the hill with a little red wagon full of booze... I want to be in her study group.
Just hide your weed in your baby brothers shirt. TSA wont check a baby, thats fucked up
As a side note, my abs are sore. Most likely cause? Orgasms. Thank you.
you were crying and trying to give advice to people.. that's was a new level of drunk for you
You were crying and asking his mom "why doesn't he like road head?"
When you get here, kick me in the balls. It's really important. - I'll explain later.
Just made a PowerPoint called "Reasons Why You Should Fuck Me" at his request. The sad thing is we've had sex before...
I got so high that I ate a protein bar while in the shower. I then proceeded to leave half the protein bar and the wrapper on the ledge in my shower. Haha oh well.
I'm scrolling through our convo thread and all we talk about is pizza, alcohol & dick with the occasional "I miss you" thrown in.
dude, shes trippin so bad. idk what shes on, she just told me she doesnt remember her name then proceeded to get in the shower clothed to try to "rinse off the high"
so you can go out and drink with me then fuck me, or you can come over when i get home and fuck me, or you can come over before and fuck me, or you can come over before and after and fuck me... so many fucking options
I just Spray tanned myself while high as fuck its either going to look like a work of art or terrible graffiti
I am not even ashamed to say it, I got laid in the stairwell of the hotel, by a 29 year old. It was awesome!
I called to inform you I may or may not be getting laid tonight ...
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