i wants your nipples near my face. PLEASE????
he squeezed my boobs like he didn't know what else to do with them, then turned down head...
told you he was gay.
One person in the car. Three blizzards. Alot of judging.
Well I woke up with spatula marks on my ass and burns on my hands.
note to self: an IV pole is no substitute for a stripper pole. Written it on my ankle cast.
Ok just don't go to jail. I saw your account balance. It can't take that.
Look. You've gotta stop making this about you, and make it about my vagina.
WHY AM I ALWAYS THE ASSHOLE WHO BREAKS OUT THE SHOTS
If you end up at a gay bar on a tuesday night in steelers pjs, does that mean youve hit rock bottom?
I feel like at this point in my life I should be dating someone who doesn't run out of all his money on Mondays and have to wait til fridy to buy his weed
Did you leave ur panties in the sink?
Kitchen or bathroom?
I think he fucked my hip out of place.
1) Woke up alone with my bathing suit on inside out spooning an empty bottle of Jack, 2) get the fuck on to my level 3) please pick me up and bring a stuffed pony, some Oreo's and my pride...
I don't care that he's really strong. I need him to make me cum not fix my back problems
my near death experience doubled as my sexual awakening
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