Dude, she's just using you for your money, and Cavs tickets.
Honestly, what else do I have going for me?
You make a valid point.
i like to finish this college football season knowing that not once have I had to masturbate to erin andrews
Just orgasmed in traffic. Starting to have feelings for my commute.
afterward, he apologized, hugged me, and then gave me a granola bar and said “this is my apology gift.”
If you don't come out tonight, who's going to wake us up in the morning because they're fucking in the middle of the room where everyones sleeping?
lets just use each other and get past this awkward stage. forget my name.
i was gonna do a lot worse than just throw cat food on you while you were passed out, but then you sleep vomited and i felt a little bad
We ate our feelings. Then drank our feelings. I feel feminism delivered.
Braid them armpits, sister.
Well to me, someone is not really my friend until we go to a mcdonalds drunk at 4am. It's like a right of passage
I think he's only dating me for my ass...
can i get licensed in dentistry online like a priest
Okay so I just had a really great idea
no.
I needed to pee, so I climbed out his window
In the last 2 hours I managed to have romantic starlit sex on the beach as the tide came in with not only just a gorgeous man, but one who happens to be Eastern European and finishing Harvard law school.
Oh wow. I want to be you right now.
just stepped out my front door and let the wind dry my naked body because I was too lazy to go search for a clean towel that may not even exist. I could live like this forever
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