Houston.. we have a drinking problem..
Those 2 guys from the sonic commercial will be virgins for life.
I don't know how, but he made a bong out of a hamster wheel. To say I am impressed is an understatement.
I just told my sister I love her. I'm in no condition to drive.
YOU GOT KICKED OUT OF FIVE GUYS LAST NIGHT FOR THROWING PEANUTS AT THE PEOPLE WHO WORK THERE?!
correction: escorted out
what is the most politically correct way to ask if he still hangs out with the guy that has blue hair and make meth in his car?
No that's sign language, not a drinking game. I tried to join
She basically needs a man who will never act up and take all of her shit
I'm even having trouble finding a guy who's taller than me with no unibrow.. someone needs to tell her its time to lower her standards
attractive or not, he has more than one book on serial killers. i'm gonna get out of here while i can
When I said I wanted you to make noise during sex, I didn't mean mocking ones.
I'm gonna eat more dunkaroos to cope with what's in my vagina.
we had a full conversation and he only brought up drugs twice. overall I'd call it a success
I got sprayed in the face with titty milk and I'm still so traumatized
Last night was fun but it wasn't right. I will say that our lives intersected for a brief and intense moment and we will just leave it there.
So, I'm roughly 90% sure that the guy next to me in the xray waiting room is watching porn on his phone right now
Randomize
