This ginger kid smells like a queef popsicle
I can see my step sister's thong. Don't know if I should let myself be turned on or not
He went through and tagged himself on my crotch in all of my facebook pics
remember when mike pissed in his pants and then put a double cheeburger in the pocketsss of said wet pants for "safe keeping"? yea drunker then that.
Is it wrong that I didn't stop masterbating when the credit card company called?
did you answer or finish?
both
I think I suffocated him while I was riding his face
You walked away saying that you had to pee and you never came back. We found you an hour later in his roommate's bed. Under the covers. Still in your wet bathing suit.
he asked me to "shake his dick" when he introduced himself, playing naked football with you in our living room. $100 says you two get married one day.
If your mother gets up on the bar again, I will. The bouncer already had a talk with her earlier.
And I don't know if this is really ESP, or just a crazy feeling, but I'm pretty sure he has an std. Or at least a cold.
His friend still there? Be like "I need to see both of your dicks ASAP"
I knew it was on when all she had to say about the handcuffs was 'I really hope these adjust tighter!'
Shes yelled my World of Warcraft name when we were having sex, I think marriage is next.
Why did I wake up covered in glitter next to a half eaten cheeseburger?
so i fell out of a tree on the ave last night. someone told me there was alcohol at the top. bastards.
Randomize
