If there was a creeper hall of fame you and me would be the first two inductees
I just filled out my 2010 Census drunkenly. I'm single handedly throwing it off.
she took her bra off and it was like the puppet strings had been dropped. her tits totally deflated.
just leaving uw hospital. they thought i had franzia-induced appendicitis. whaaaaat
One blow job doesn not make me gay.
She gave 2 thumbs up when Nirvana came on the radio while blowing me in the bathroom
i just remembered i chipped my tooth last night when i pulled up your pants zipper with my teeth
And the funny thing is when I went to the kitchen this morning, all 4 pizzas were still there in their boxes, untouched. My question to you is: what were we eating last night?
I have reverted to folding laundry while watching porn. how much sadder can my life get?
You were walking away to pee and as you were undoing your belt you looked at me and said "the belt is off. the game is on. Remever that."
I'm currently eating a turkey dinner, listening to xplosive by dr. Dre, and drinking rum. Hispanic christmas dinners are the best.
I remember because you made a pirate noise when you came.
Im selling my dirty underwear to pay for that cruise. NO JUDGEMENT . I love you lol ❤❤ also dont tell anyone
This is why I should’ve just stuck with blow jobs. I’m good at blow jobs. Blow jobs never fail me.
the coup got in the way of sex but inauguration day came thru we did it joe
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