she kept yelling 'call me bella'
TAKE DOWN THAT PHOTO OF ME IN THE NURSES COSTUME NOW.
I have one brief flash of having his dick in my hand. that's all I remember.
Maybe not, but you have to admit watching him get hit by the car was gratifying
He picked me up went to throw me on his bed. I landed on the wood frame. That's how I broke my rib. We still fucked. Thanks tequila. Best injury ever
You just sent me a picture of a federal crime. Like. You don't give a fuck.
your fridge is broken, your sock drawer is full of snow, and you flipped off the whole stadium on the big screen. I'd say it went well.
Also this freshmen guy is talking about his gag reflex and no one is making blowjob jokes. I have no faith in the next generation.
What I thought was my travel sanitizer was actually my travel lube. Most awkward transit ride of all time!
So do I get to ride the beginning of the November stache or what?
I sharted in my christmas pjs :(
Did you get your nipples pierced? I felt something poking through my shirt earlier and I really didn't want to say anything in front of your grandma...
She stood up through my sunroof the entire drive home. screaming her ass off and singing free falling..
Just peed on the front lawn of the capital building. Great American.
Went to bed still wearing my bralette. When I was changing this morning, a Tootsie Roll fell out. I'm definitely living my best life.
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