This bar receipt from last night makes no sense
You were wasted and got mad that it was too high so you subtracted 50 bucks in the tip line from the total
I wish that would've worked
Can I use cash for clunkers to trade in her boobs for a new set of 18 year old tits?
Its worth a shot.
We owe the rent and you're unemployed...you're in no financial position to flirt with cocaine addiction.
You know you're deprived when the only thing you taste while chewing gum is the 2 grams of sugar alcohol.
smoking a bowl while I'm peeing. i love having a big dick.
i walked in on you eating. you had the fridge wide open and you were rotating between steak and handfuls of captain crunch.
see these eyes, they just want to bone and go to sleep.
Found out it was only pneumonia. We celebrated hydrocodone cough syrup. Two long island ice teas at lunch and the random white powder we found in her purse. Mother of the year award.
The heart of my unhappiness in my job is that it's not a place where coworkers and I can draw dicks on everything to amuse each other
Do u like your dick pics shot in hotdog or hamburger orientation?
I just saw two homeless guys bond over the fact that they both use Crown Royal bags as wallets in Burger King.
God it's like my stomach is full of drunk bees
I will never use my dick in anger. With great dick comes great responsibility
I went to BBQ fest on Wednesday and came home wearing a different shirt, so I think I did some good damage.
I know it's 10:30am but Finding Dory starts in an hour, and I have four points of molly. You down?
Randomize
