Kareoke will never be a sober sport
how do you spell 'special'? like slow?
S P E L L C H E C K
No you dumbass thats not right
he just said he'd buy the porn
its a step up from the last guy
Barsexuality is the new black.
Well he asked to have a sober hang out so i guess that constitutes as a date in college
don't you miss freshman year when you could get away with "but i've never given a bj before..."
At a St Pats house party. Just raised $110 for two short chicks to crawl into a dog cage together. Video forthcoming. Respect.
In line at the grocery store. The girl ahead of me is in a wetsuit and just bought 3 cases of beer and a bottle of vodka. I want to go where she's going...
Quick question, when did I develop feelings, and how can I make them go away?
That's two questions.
I'm looking for mother nature. And when I find her, I'm looking her right in the eyes and telling her to fuck off.
It makes me really sad that some people start their saturdays running or biking instead of with 3 shots of tequila, a sausage biscuit, freaks & geeks and 2 orgasms.
If you are breathing, I want you at your house. No non-breathing-related excuses.
So I've reached a new low. After completing my walk of shame and being told "see you around", I took off my heels to discover he had came in my shoe.
Yeah it got awkward when the two guys we were playing beer pong against realized that I'd hooked up with both of them. Their teamwork declined after that.
If he has a beard, chances are, that’s an open invitation to sit on his face
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