Do you ever think that bumblebee is the gay transformer?
Every day of my life.
do you want me to make hamburgers?
i'm vegan
i'll put lettuce on them
You named all of the cocktail shrimps and then tackled a guy for "eating Henry"
The hookah bar is playing i'm on a boat. I believe in god again.
You were so hammed, you asked your buddy in Economics to plot a demand curve for Parmesan Cheese.
I haven't shaved in at least a week, he said "obviously neither one of us was prepared for this"
you also choked him out with your legs on the kitchen floor..
I remember pointing out how smooth my legs were to try to direct his attention away from my vagina.
How do you get a black eye playing beer pong??
Our sex bag has now been upgraded to sex luggage, with wheels, and now features a first aid kit. Game. On.
Travis is back on this booty and burgers thing. If I'm his delivery service for food he better fuck me how I want.
There is pretty much a target on everyone's lips when I am drunk. EVERYONE
I mean, I would have, but I couldn't come up with a logical reason to bring up oral sex during an orientation.
you know its getting late when the "nevers" are turning into "maybe"
i’n just gonna forge ahead, gag reflex be DAMNED.
Randomize
