So when exactly did I get naked and makeout with the statue?
I GPSed you we're an hour and 14min away from each other
and it's going to stay that way
I just cleaned my sheets and decided to do a black light test. My headboard is a masterpiece.
Dude we got so high last night. I said "watch this" threw a goldfish cracker in the toilet, and laughed my ass off. We watched the dvd menu for 30 minutes too.
it was great that she threw up because that made me the only one trying to hook up with her
hot doctor. gonna get him to touch my tits. 'think i felt a lump' excuse in 3-2-1...
I have Retrograde Ejaculation as a side effect from one of my meds. Is this a respectable form of birth control?
TAing a class of 300 froshies and being so hungover I forgot a bra is my way of making dreams come true.
Seriously though a big penis is like a puppy dog, or a sunny day or some other glorious thing
You are such a penis elitist
ALMOST WRECKED MY SCOOTER. DAVE FRANCO HAS A TWIN AMD HE GOES HERE
Everytime I try to keep track of the amount of people I slept with I always forget about that guy I met on the dc metro, where I woke up to him organizing his Special K and Molly and I was covered in sleeping cats.
He was so fat that he broke two of my ribs
Maybe it's time to stop screaming I'm a chubby chaser every time you enter a drinking establishment
I found her outside drinking steak sauce out of the bottle.
Haha we both slept with guys named Brad born on may 1st. This is a proud day for sisters.
He stopped the gas pump at 69 and gave me my receipt. He wants it.
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