mark looks like s**t tonight! thank da lawd we broke up!
it's mark...i'm guessing you didn't mean to send that to me...
Remeber, hes got nothing better to offer you than drunk words and hairy balls.
America approved of our night. A bald eagle flew over us at 7am
I feel like hell. The amount of black beans I found in my hair tells me I hit rock bottom
when it says do not use on the face or genital areas, it MEANS do not use on the face or genital areas.
But youre all cute and shit. Woo that cunt. And by cunt i mean strong independent woman
She made out with the kickboxers bf. She was just asking to get kicked in the head. In the middle of the bar.
I went to bed at ten on a Friday night I have virtues to spare
DRAW HIM A PICTURE OF SOME FUCING AWESOME THING. LIKE A UNICORN OR SOME SHIT. FANTASTIC.
When that wave blew your top off I heard someone yell "SPANK BANK"
As a former fat girl, that's probably the best compliment I've ever received ever!
I just accidentally showed an old lady a pic of my penis while showing her cat pics. So how's your day going?
I do not mind being torn from the first touches of sleep to see a man who looks like that
My FitBit tracked the calories I burned during sex. Hello 2015!
Meh, all I have to do tomorrow is proctor an AP test. No loud noises and no physical activity allowed for almost 4 hours. Sounds like the perfect recovery period for a hangover.
Thanks for letting me cross "getting high at park with children" off my bucket list
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