Don't feel obligated to get back to me but I think I just fell in love with a middle aged waitress at the Dennys in waco. She's used but in good condition.
You should just wear a sign that says "I like cheap Chinese food and anal"
I like taco bell too
the only plus side is that now I'll be able to tell my son not to trust the condoms that his college gives away..........
As im putting my laundry in the machine, i find a solo cup and a pong ball that i signed babe ruth
apparently breaking a beer bottle and then throwing up in a urinal is a terrible way to pick up girls.
I would just like you to know that the guy I blew off last weekend to come find ur drunk ass just got drafted into the major leagues.
Moment of silence for the loss of that option.
He told her Jesus wouldnt yell curse or degrade her. He'd just simply shake his head and slap the shit out of her
The brazilian leg lock that the stripper put me in was definitely the highlight of the night
She proposed we share a dildo. Hopefully she was joking.
I'm in your room because it's a safe space. Is it ok to pee in here?
I love you. Go after that dick
Anne is dead. totally passed out and was flat out in the street
Sorry you uh had to see that last night. That's the problem with open fields, no privacy...
I like that they’re all named Christopher or Chris. No need to worry about moaning during!
If I wanna spend the whole night tied up and getting railed I'm allowed to do so
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