thank you for a lively/lovely evening :)
should have blown me.
Dude, everyone in your family has slept with that girl. Her vagina is like the Hindu version of a Bar Mitzvah.
we banged on the home plate. i wasnt even aware of the significance of where we were until afterwards hahaha
At my internship. I get drug tested tmr at 2
Are they going to pay you for the one day you worked?
i dont feel like going...you don't know how much work goes into getting my whore on
What is a reasonable amount of condoms to keep in my condom wallet without it being creepy that I have too many?
It was honestly like he was directing a porno or something. he kept telling different people to grab other people's boobs, it was all very artistic.
I took so my adderall all I can do is lie on my floor and stare too hard at my hedgehog. He has 42 spines in the dark spot on his shoulder btw.
i told him I'd let him eat part of a weed cookie out of my cleavage, so he pulled over like a gentleman.
I came home wearing somebody's thong. If you're missing one message me privately.
Was having the best sex dream I've had in a while and only woke up when I heard my grandma fall down the stairs.
I feel like I smell like bad decisions
I'm determining which apartments I'm mostly to move into based on how suitable the kitchens are for sex .
Sunburned by dick at the nude beach. Bad. She tried to blow me. But. I. Just. Can't. Saddest day of my life.
he's like the highest ranking tongue wizard i know.
Randomize
