I'm saving my limes so I'll know how many drinks I've had.
I do the same thing, but I use ice cubes.
If you had to guess, would you say that as a species, midgets are more or less flammable than humans?
Less. Duh. They have less combustible mass.
I love how its suddenly "not all about sex" now that he can't get it up
The ratio was 19 to 1 and the 1 was lauren so it didn't even count.
he borrowed my computer and saw his name in my recent google searches. Things got awkward real fast.
If you win this game of words with friends, ill suck you off for 30 minutes. No lie.
I cant last that long. Do i get the rollover minutes?
So I have the professor convinced that the textbook will take another week to deliver. that should give me enough time to replace the cash i spent on strippers.
He came in my nose, then said it would help clear my sinuses.
More or less binge drinking as a giant grape seemed justified
Here's the level of my committment: I'm not participating in the Olympic opening ceremonies drinking game. THIS IS SERIOUS.
I went to the bar saying i wasn't going to drink that much. I forgot sobriety might as well be some mythical creature when you're with Holleey
if i ever wake up in the morning and don't feel a boner in my asscrack then this relationship is over
We BOTH lost our virginities there. It's basically a landmark.
i think i just lost a toe
I can't believe the MLB is making the NHL look good.
Randomize
