Did you draw a mustache on my drivers license picture??
dude, never take two tylenol pm and smoke three bowls. i feel like i'm covered in cold ants.
I just looked at all of our spring break pictures... there's a guy getting a blow job in the background of the ones on the beach.
We're upstairs smoking....the password is pineapple
sometimes i wish i was a boob, they get to chill in soft and cuddly little cup things.
We got kicked out of the ice rink last night for drinking and checking strangers... but they let us keep the beer
You don't understand, we were on a waffle house. Both of us were absolutely certain we passed out at his place then BAM! Waffle house.
This girl is wasted dancing to The Final Countdown. She's grinding on a guy who came to the bar in a track jacket and a wife beater
A homeless man gave him a blanket and an ambulance drove him to sarahs...
We have a little not a lot. We already rolled a blunt and named him Ron.
We were still up at 6am, taking shots, because thats apparently how he liked to "get the day started".
Happy 4th. Did you guys get your syphilis thing taken care of?
I'm definitely not going to be able to fuck him high. I won't be able to not laugh at his man boobs
I sit across from him at graduation so I get to stare at him and think about how I fucked his step brother and laugh to myself
I need to align my fucking chakras
Randomize
