Lost. The hour! Funtime!!!!
Dear __, it'd be a lot easier to fuck if you ever responded. So I'm throwing in the white towel, since I no longer know what you want. Sincerely, ___
I'm laying in your front yard are you home
Court Ordered Rehab!!! Do you think I'll need a swimsuit?
I am like the Mr. Miyagi of queefs.
you dont remember trying to break dance in the middle of the casino floor on ur own throw up?
oh that explains alot.
It took my four years to get this degree, and 4 hours to lose it, My parents are not impressed.
we sixty- nined on a tennis court.. not even drunk. you say insane. i say creative genius.
I think I need to donate blood to see if I have Hepatitis. Again.
It was awful. Mid hookup he started reading the titles of the books over my bed, which were about Russian imperial history. He then started asking me questions about the class I was reading the books for. I was like "WE HAVE TIME FOR THAT LATER, PLEASE CONTINUE."
Woke up naked next to Alex and he was braiding my hair and then commented on how healthy my hair was. I don't even know anymore..
i am an animal i am literally locking myself in my house and not coming out for a week i don't deserve to be in public
Interesting occurrence: the application I use to keep track of my periods and sexual encounters just notified me it had been over 4 months since you were logged as an active partner and ask if I'd like to remove you from my options. Wow, kmsl.
Why is it pressure? I want to see your cute face and possibly sit on it. You make it like its a bad thing.
I put the child locks on after I put you in the car and you then screamed, "I am a Phoenix, you can't restrain me. I NEED TO FLY!"
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