i only hope i can top last weeks sext session
She was lying the whole time!
She was a great actress
I was a great dumbass
He just stood there...Helen Keller and I could have had a more interesting conversation
It's official. I am the girl who threw up in the library. Hangovers and midterms do not mix.
Hit a new low. I'm FB stalking him while he is lying in bed sleeping naked next to me. He fell asleep with FB still open and unlocked on his iPad.
I like using largw condoms because they are more comfortable but also I feel bad because it's like false advertisement
wearing the bible to the ABC party, thought you'd appreciate that.
Welcome to a new world. May the gods of weed smile upon you as you embark on exploring this new dimension.
After we had sex he told me it was a "goodbye gift". We haven't talked since.
sexting foreigners is the best. they respond with silly things like "love that tits"
Nothing tops off the night like giving emotional and spiritual guidance to a 70 year old transvestite.
If you keep giving me that glorious dick ill bake you some cookies
I have put on lipstick and signed up for class. Nothing more shall be expected of me today.
Okay everything with a penis is officially dead in my eyes
as i was trying not to drunkingly fall off her toliet, i noticed her socks laying there. i quickly grabbed them, ran upstairs, and excitingly asked her if she had gotten them at sams club. she replied with, "...those are your socks."
Randomize
