i hope you realize when i said "grib" earlier i was referring to the gridded binary, a mathematically concise data format commonly used in meteorology to store historical weather forecast data. also meant in referential conjunction to my probability math class that i am failing at roughly 215pm tomorrow afternoon.
He said he used to draw on the walls with poop when he was a kid.
Best news of the day: the hot chick at the funeral was NOT related to me... Thank god
Why the fuck is BBQ sauce coming out of my shower head?
Is it bad that we're talking like nothing happened?
Ah. Blossoming love after wild blackout drunk sex.
Hey thanks again for rolling me that blunt necklace. It was amazing.
Who ever is in the stall next to me is crying and it sounds like they're doing massive amounts of blow too. Finals for your ass huh.
That hot guy i showed you guessed my exact bra size. I want to have his tan babies.
Hopefully my orange shoes will distract people's attention from my crippling awkwardness
My therapist keeps stopping to ask what 'hooking up' means
ITS ORAL SEX CAROL
sorry for the random call. He stopped mid-sex because he wanted confirmation that I was really a reverend.
I only know one person in my class and that's my dealer.
i spent most of last night convincing myself that dan akroyd wasn't actually standing in my bathroom holding a dead chicken
Making friends with the guy who had alcohol-infused whipped cream was the best decision I made all night.
if you want the landscaping job, the uniform is a speedo. no exceptions.
Randomize
