And now I'm afraid that I'm a pornographic eater.
Just whacked off in the middle of writing a paper, gave me great ideas. Note, should do this more often.
I didn't know it was possible to make picking up dog shit look sexy.
She did the bend and snap...
yes we did fuck in his chapter room. yes it was demeaning. and yes, they probably will discuss it at chapter tonight.
searching "dave" under the university of pittsburgh on facebook was not exactly how i hoped to find my baby daddy
I accidentally peed all over the couch. It's safe to say I'm not welcome at that house anymore
for the record, you never really realize how drunk you still are until you get on rollerskates...
I'm just gonna pretend you didn't ask me that. I'll sweep that shattered moment of our friendship under the shame rug.
Somehow he made it really romantic
He came on your tits... That doesn't scream romance to me.
I actually just took 17 pictures of some guy at the gas station that needs to marry me now
You've opened Pandora's butthole my friend. There's no going back.
I never realized how weird our shower smells until I cracked a shower beer and had a familiar aroma to compare it to.
I think my dick has healed enough that we can start having sex again
She said if you lived here it would be like the x rated version of 3's company
No instead we fucked in the elevator.. it was wrong on so many levels..
How tall was the building? Maybe it was only wrong on some of them
Randomize
