what happened last night??
everyone saw ******'s vagina
and that's just the beginning
yesterday i saw a blind man guiding himself into a NYC tour bus... and i thought i waste money
Next weekend I am getting a library card and staying my whore ass home.
I forgot it was 4/20. that COMPLETELY explains the 7/11. i was like "that's a lot of white dudes... and they're really into snacking."
she just announced that once she was paid to deep throat a light saber with a mint flavored condom on it. i'm speechless.
Drunk lesbians having an argument about their realationship isn't as hot as I imagined.....
The other. Cat spoke to me and left. This shit is laced
The first cat might save me but they are taking out masks
CHEMICAL ENGINEER. God my mom would be so proud of me.
Shaving my legs with an ankle monitor on is surprisingly more difficult than the drunk driving that got me here
Why did I wake up with condoms on all my fingers?
Considering the girl you hooked up with, I'd be concerned about not having one on your penis.
Aside from having sex with a rando in a toga on george's couch i think taking plan b in the library is the most hashtag college thing i've ever done
I'm eating pizza in the bathtub
He totally just went there for sex cuz he slept in her roommates bed the rest of the night after they were done...
pure definition of booty call.
Little girl was fucking around on the train and completely ran her head into a pole. Totally burst out laughing as she cried. Her mom was not amused. I don't think I should be a Mom. EVER.
This whole brainwashing thing is easy!
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