Kroger has a sale on economy packs of some ridic brand of condom with a smiley devil heart on it $4.99 for 24
Sounds like a baby waitign to happen
Is it wrong that I didn't stop masterbating when the credit card company called?
did you answer or finish?
both
we hate each other therefore the sex is mindblowing
Despite what happened tonight, Im still expecting Jesus birthday sex
she was using bread to soak up the vodka off the floor then proceeded to eat it.
I made him go down on me for 40 mins then pretended to pass out. I swear, I'm like a boy.
So this guy is eyeing me from across the bar. Either the girl I hit on next to him is his girlfriend or he's her gay best friend. I should show him my Penis and find out.
Dude. Do it.
Definitely her date. But she saw it too. So now he used to be her date. Why can't this stuff Happen when I'm sober?
THE CONDOM ONLY COVERS HALF OF HIS DICK I AM IN THE BATHROOM PANICKING
no dude free pina colada`s taste like what I would expect my penis to taste like except gay-er.
Sorry about all of the penis things that happened last night.
If TJ is short for Trader Joe, I'm gonna fuck him
dude, last night I won a real sword and a bottle of vodka in a cards against humanity tournament
I almost just opened my door to get my pizza butt ass naked
long story short, he tried to fuck me standing up, toppled over, and now I have four stitches next to my eye
I gave him breakup sex, AGAIN
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