Confirm your location. A cross street is best, but if google mapping yourself is your least-shameful option go for it. ps- going through his mail for an actual address is always an option.
I mean I'm basically single. Or maybe just an asshole. Either way.
you did pass out in the elevator last night, so it could be motion sickness
I was. I was trying to blow bubbles in the toilet after I threw up in it. They had to carry me everywhere. I lost a sock.
So, I just sold my textbook to have money for Plan B.
Just wondering did you put mouse traps and brownies on my porch?
Just saw out breathalyzer tubes from last night on the side of the road. Glad the cop let us know that they are biodegradable
It's was about average. But he had a tat on his thigh that said "pull-out n' rollout" so I won't have to worry about a round two request.
He always tells me he misses my clit. I feel like I should make a drinking game out of it
I definitely think in addition to buying paint ball guns this summer we should invest in a breathalyzer. That way every drunk night turns into a competition, who can blow over the legal limit more. The loser gets shot while hungover. Shit goes hand in hand if you ask me.
Remember that time you puked in a beer pong cup while someone else was playing?
that happened
I was going to say "wearing plaid doesn't make you gay, I wear plaid!" but then... heavy sigh
By the way can you translate "sorry, she played you bruh" to Spanish? Some Hispanic guy who spoke absolutely no English callled me last night and when I tried to tell him he had the wrong number the response was "como? No no no no...." And then click. He was gone
If you’re wondering why the bong is outside the garage door just know I was being environmentally efficient by not using the freezer to chill my shit
I know her cup size but not her name....
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