"I want to just tie you up so you\'ll still be here like this when I get home." Actual words.
I'm not conventionally pretty...I'm just crazy
I'm almost 25, which means I can ride with girls that have permits
my brother is so whacked out on percocet from hurting his legs that he started crying because his belly button was so cute
So I decided to put different foods on my dick to see which would feel the best
and??
Cake is only good when you eat it
this bucketlist has just become an excuse for me to be slutty, and i'm not even ashamed
Sexual tension squid is drowning in the sexual tension
do you know where my other puke covered boot is
Kripsy Kremes at our place, bring your own coffee. And your own donuts because these ones are ours.
So never has there been a greater Valentine's Day gift than you actually putting a new roll of toilet paper on for me after using the old roll up! You didn't even use the new roll. You clearly put that on from a gentleman's standpoint vs. a selfish standpoint. I love you!!!!
He shattered his pelvis base jumping so his dicks out of commission for 4 months. Your up, second string.
We don't have the same problems as normal people do we?
You are free to stop by. I promise to keep my penis in my leather pants
he made me cum so hard i had an asthma attack
He just sprayed AXE in his mouth to get rid of his bad breath... THAT DRUNK
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