i want to bang the Snorg tees girl.. shes always smiling ;)
New game: Step 1) Turn on ESPN. Step 2) Drink every time someone says "LeBron."
I left puerto rico a week ago and my vagina still smells like coconut.
NEW RULE: NO INNAPROPRIATE CHOICES THAT INVOLVE GUNS. I LIKE IT. WRITE THAT DOWN.
Oh and probably wearing a life jacket instead of clothes didn't help things either
do you think they make 'sorry for walking in on you drunkenly jacking of to a picture of me' cards?
how did my horoscope know i was too hungover to operate a stove.
Is it too forward to say "stop being a good friend and start being a good fuck buddy"
The cougar has a calendar on her wall of when she can give topless handjobs again. I pity her husband.
Quick how do you hit on a guy in the car behind you? It's important.
I think I've been there, but who knows? I drink a lot
I have loved her ever since she went down on my first wife
i feel as though me waking up and asking her if i went to the hospital was a sign that i was not okay
Why is there an inflatable flamingo in the backseat of my car?
Im glad your laughing because im currently convincing my penis you didnt mean it and its all gunna be ok.
Randomize
