like why cant he just admit that he still wants to fuck me even though im underage
Houston, we have a problem
where are u?
Houston. That's the problem. I don't know how I got here.
my neighbors garage sale is really cutting into the time of day when i can smoke weed on my deck.
please just be careful, i just switched my facebook status to "in a relationship", i would look really pathetic if i had to change it back to "single" already
dude I'm not 100% but I think your mom is sexting me.
I maybe late, he's in a peeing contest with the neighbor's dog. Currently he's in the lead.
Screw them and thier engaged asses. I've got liquor to drink and boys I don't know to make out with.
Hey girl, do you remember you made me brush your hair with a plastic fork on Saturday night?
I still don't understand if he's using me to write his resume or if we're dating
I'm getting paid over-time to sit on reddit and look at dicks and abs all day. I'm really happy right now.
That's how pantless uber rides happen
I made out with a 40 year old and told her we were dating then got kicked out of a gay bar. This is the day I stop drinking.
I like to make sure they know it's casual by giving then a high five after sex
And by "have lunch together" you mean me giving you a blow job in the back of your Tahoe, right?
Obviously you're feeling a little sexually frustrated.
I consider humping a stranger every ten minutes when I walk in the street.
Randomize
