youre lurking in front of me
I cant take that shot because i want my penis to stay hard.
I actually just cleaned easy glide lube off my desk. My life has gone way down hill since I met you.
I swear she didn't look like that last week.
Just had a conversation with Jon gosselin
Until you fuck him in front of his kids stop wasting my time with stupid texts.
the third sister isn't as attractive as the other two but I will do her anyway to finally pull off the fabled family hat trick.
Hiding in the clothes rack at walmart like a 4 year old. Already scared 3 people. New fav weekend activity
Petting the cat and listening to "you've got a friend". This is why I smoke weed. To make sense of situations like this.
I just compared drinking to love. How do these people not know I'm an alcoholic?
Listen, you need to start thinking with your vagina and not with your heart... That emotional shit is for your 30s.
SORRY! Pervert came out for a bit. BAD PERVERT! BACK IN YOUR HOME!
I am sending my doctor an XXXMas card thanking him for my tits!
He's got a british accent, a tounge ring, and he's wearing an eye patch... Of corse I'm fucking him
That girl is like a master class on how to be an unlovable crazy person.
By the way, you totally deserve "i got a job sex".
Randomize
