I hate when my naked walk-arounds are interrupted by someone knocking on the door
Can someone please explain to me why I woke up looking like Ziggy Stardust
And by "got a tattoo" i mean i got a tattoo in the dorm bathrooms with a guy using his cousin's tattoo gun.
I was basically shocked at how calmly you accepted my violently shoving a french fry in your mouth.
I woke up with hair in my teeth and half his beard was missing.
He has a lot of emotional energy invested in your vagina.
Dude. You stood in a corner laughing your ass off while folding clothes, facing the wall. Yes, they were weed brownies..
If I don't go to Australia I'm using that towards a new car. If I do I'll use it to buy a koala.
nope. just stoned. wishing i had a golf cart.
jesus, I think that canada gold metal game has completely changed all rules of acceptable drinking habits, I was fucked untill noon and I just got invited to go party when I get off work...at 600am...and NO ONE understood why i was hesitant
I made a booty call at 3:30 am on a Monday... I think I just became the ultimate female fuckboy. I don't know whether to be ashamed or get myself a trophy.
Is it a bad sign starting the new year off naked, wet, and alone?
Asking for a friend of course
He once bought a dildo and put fifty dollars and a happy anniversary note in the battery compartment I gotta lock him down while hes available
just learned i can hear my fish chewing his food WHILE HES IN HIS BOWL. im going to have to call you back.
Help. Why am I so naked?
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