Steve is enlightening me on how and why u put gerbils up your ass
I got spanked with a cardboard tube. Apparently he used to be a percussionist. Who favored marching band tunes. It was weird.
high in an attic. pig roast in 10.
No no no. When you take one for the team, there are no stipulations or conditions
Things got outta hand once she told me to water-board her with Patron.
Are you asking me on a date where we get shithoused and do some fingerpainting?
whenever he tweets that he wants to get blackout it's like a neon sign for "i want to bang you tonight"
I sat on the toilet and peed through my jeans, then I pissed the bed and blamed him...do you think well have a 2nd date?
You're tall, so I have high hopes for your dick.
Drunkness level: fluent in olde norse
Sexual favors are the only currency recognized by the Republic of Greg
Talk about having your cake and eating it he has basically demolished the whole fucking bakery
Just woke up. Will be over soon. DON'T LEAVE THE CHAMPAGNE UNSUPERVISED.
This is the best thing we've done since that time we started a religion
He said we had an hour long conversation about how awesome I was.
Randomize
