she's not even a shacker, she never made it inside. she's just a porch girl
It's nice to sit in the library and see the progression from freshman pledge to 6th year coke addict all at one table. Gotta love sororities
he squeezed my boobs like he didn't know what else to do with them, then turned down head...
told you he was gay.
Cancel that soberness update. I just almost fell down in the security line
Of course drinkings involved. They don't call it alcoholism because we eat too many skittles.
I want "hickeys on my ass" sex
The guys in the quick check just recognized me as the girl who bought rolling papers and whipped cream. This is the walk of shame on crack.
I will show up on your front porch in a wet t shirt and some mac and cheese
I know I say this every year but 2015 will be the year I finally have sex with David's sister
He had a flex off with himself in the mirror but he thought it was someone else for at least 20minutes.
Leaving Denver airport I just saw a group of young Republicans in matching green T-shirts that said "4/20 Baby!"
I made soup. Now I'm having post soup making wine. I had pre soup making wine also.
YOU GOT ME SO DRUNKK
i got me so drunk!
Sharted again. Stuck in traffic. Fuck
I need you to get the emergency bail money out if the stuffed panda and go to the police station tot bail me out. I should be there in 20 minutes.
Randomize
