No, computers are like whores. moody bitches that cost too much and no matter how much protection you have you can still get a virus
A moment of silence for all our pussy whips bro's who had to endure the NEW MOON premier!
just convinced someone I was a virgin. I love when people don't know me.
It will be a surprise...all i can say is stripper clown
He likes Jesus. Game over.
Oooh wait, he just told me he was high.
Emergency need house key where r u I just got shit o n
theres a kid in a leopard robe and sunglasses filling up a gas tank. i miss college
After this weekend, it looks come this holiday season I'll be walking in a winter abortionland.
So both cops helped talk her into coming back into the bar and doing a shot with me. The main argument being, "a bar is no place to be sober!"
I may or may not have just let Ash Ketchum capture my wild Pikachu in a parking lot.
So random question. Does beer act the same as other alcohol disinfectants?
Peanut butter and whiskey is not a dinner
We were so sore from having sex that we decided to fix it with more sex. It's the hair of the dog for sex hangover.
You may be fancy. But you'll never be having cheesy garlic bread and scotch at 3am fancy.
So apparently my bro is going to make me fix his tattoo this trip... He sent me a pic of said tattoo. Tattoo is of a sperm, on his penis, which was in a woman's mouth... Wth
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