Who's your beautiful friend? Please include the words "Straight", "Single", and "Legal" in your response.
I think the universe is against us being together. Or maybe it's just god's way of telling me there is a bigger dick out there for me.
i do not condone bathtub ky wrestling
im sober playing flip cup. its like cheating.
She left me a voicemail too. It's just her moaning her name repeatedly
So the dentist told me I couldn't suck on anything. She emphasized ANYthing.
She always manages to outslut me. I can't keep up
Well he's in a two year college so technically hes a senior. At least can we just pretend I'm not robbing the cradle.
Needless to say they were not happy to find out that we braided their hair together, when one of them woke up needing to puke bad
How would u feel about transportimg a penis shaped ice luge to nashville?
Its 10:23 on a monday morning and im craving jello shots, this is a problem
It was like stroking your vagina with a cloud.
What's up with the fire hydrant in the laundry room?
He said he wanted to start giving out "sex souvenirs". I got a poster with a penguin on it.
Word to the wise, never look up your hot young doctors on Facebook before you're discharged. You will find things and no longer be able to take them seriously.
Randomize
