In a few years, 50 babies 50 states. Like it?
he's chasing his jose cuervo with hot tub water
Hi, I just found this phone under my seat at a brewers game and seeing as you're entered in as 'fillllatio' I figured I'd ask you if you know the illiterate ass who owns this phone. Thanks :)
I hope that the reason I've been psycho on him is that I'm pregnant and not just psycho.
Considering he believes im part of the 2016 us curling team id say hes pretty drunk
He's trying to row the canoe up my front yard like he is Lewis and Clark.
I found out that my first kiss was an Italian. Even in kindergarden i knew size mattered.
He looked at my vag and said "you have a nice situation down there. Good work"
At the end of the white elephant exchange, our professor had a big black dildo around her neck and I won a full body dinosaur suit. I could die tomorrow with no regrets.
I'm drinking Leinenkugel through a Red Vine. I'm not drunk. I'm just happy with my life so far.
by the time the kitchen caught on fire everyone was too drunk to be alarmed. the host just poured beer on it to put it out. how was yours?
Boobs speak an international language.
At some point, it turned less into sparring and more into tough guy dry humping.
Double check your contract and see if it says anything about sleeping with your manager
He lives in a tent in my ex'd backyard. Why the fuck would you want any of that dirty dick?
Randomize
