he thought i was a dude.
saw you walking with that piece of shit
and that piece of shit just read that
i get tired of guys telling me there married or they have a girlfriend. they act like it concerns or matters to me
just took my ibuprofen with ramen broth, yay college
she wants me to meet her parents and she hasn't even met my penis yet.
Fuck. These are the symptoms I had when I was pregnant. This could be bad.
Two portable blenders. We are going to be popular and dangerous.
and then she judged me for using my bra as a potholder. hard times my friend, welcome to college.
I think the pivotal moment was when we used the see and say as a drinking game with shots of whiskey. It was all downhill after that.
This is love.
Which part? The alcoholic cupcakes or the lesbian st paddys day party?
On a better note: I'm on pace for 730 female produced orgasms in 2013.
Are you doing trivia tonite? Also sorry I peed on you.
We were apparently using marine hand signals to communicate to one another where to meet up in the house to hook up.
Didn't even know I knew marine hand signals.
I haven’t been this excited since I found out they sold cases of Jack Daniels.
dont know what thebfuxk is in rhat shit, but dont lemme have antmore
Randomize
