Let's start a violent farting gang. We can do walkbys.
No, veal is cruel because they chain them down, I'm talking about free range human babys here.
Just once id like a girl to say to me in the dracula voice, i want...to suck...your dick...
Watching this movie and saying "drink every time you see an animal" was a bad idea...circle of life...holy crap
This house was built for laser tag.
She said i kept moaning her moms name instead of hers
There is a pube in my fucking eyeball
I have no idea why I said that. I have no idea why anything happened last night, I broke my toaster making a egg. I'm going to quit drinking.
We had sex twice and at Wendy's how dare you diminish that.
There. Isnt. A. Single. Person. Who. Is. Not. High. At. Church.
I just wanted a bootycall and now somehow I'm at his parents playing dominoes. But they have tequila so it's cool
P.s. There are few things I love more than brand new mascara and you are one of them.
Is it sad the checkout lady had to inform my mom she can't buy alcohol before 8am?
I have filthy fantasies involving his tongue. My vagina almost exploded while he was licking that ice cream cone.
What the fuck was I thinking eating an entire tub of potato salad on acid. My stomach today bro
Randomize