Don't you send me to vm
It's not littering; it's giving birds nest building suplies. Besides, birds love soy sauce and plastic forks.
She’s leaving for college so I made her a gift basket with all the essentials. You know- Ramen, a 12 pack of PBR, some leftover Plan B pills and a laminated business card for a good lawyer. Damn I’m a good big sister.
I accidently shit my pants. So I tried to throw my underwear in their lake, but they floated. So in the middle of the night, I got into the paddle boat and had to throw a rock on top of them so they would sink. Next time, I just won't shit myself.
my sombrero is too big for the bathroom
I ended up taking shots of whiskey and chasing them with potato wedges, I have never felt more Irish
Im drinking in homer but I guess Egan got arrestest on an "assault by water ballon" charge but tom actually threw the water balloon in question at the bartender.
I have a busted ear drum from when he honked his horn when we started to have sex on his car in the parking lot...
Just want to let you know thanks for setting the bar pretty low when it comes to girls.
If there was a card that said "I'm sorry for throwing up on your bathroom counter" I would send it to you.
Once you jizz in someones hat, you cant take it back.
Google imaged your anal issues. Seems fuckable still.
I woke up in the bathtub with money shoved down my pants. I must've done something right.
Woke up in a car, do you own a silver car parked a few miles form the house...hope so
Irony: drinking your pre workout supplement out of the cup your Krispy Kreme doughnut holes came in.
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