don't you miss dr. quinn: medicine woman? i do.
wait so...it's like an actual thing to masturbate using the detachable shower head? WTF I thought I was being creative!
so far i wrote 500 words for a paper on sean paul performing we be burnin..i can officially do anything on adderral
About to find out how well alcohol and lazer tag mix.
third eye blind makes so much more sense now that i have a drug problem
Sorry I sent so many blank messages. My hands are slippery. Don't ask why.
Called Jeff last night and told him I wanted to have sex in the airport terminal. Blackout Brooke definitely came out last night.
I decided they need a food cart that just roams around the library like the cotton candy people at the circus. But with real food. like tacos cause it sounds delicious.
The jerky fairy visited my fridge. It's glorious.
I'm proud of you, you were pretty classy last night, you didn't puke AND you didn't take off your shirt, except for those two times in the corner.
Hey can you send me a copy of my mugshot? I need it to prove a point
I'm running late...how do you explain period shits to your boss?
After you finished the $300 bottle of wine you just started crying about how if Mulder and Scully didn't invite you to join the x-files your life would be meaningless because you "love that weird shit"
He left cushions on my floor, chocolate on my bra and unexplained scratches on my thighs. I think this one might get a second date.
I need to hurry up and get over my feelings for him so next year's tipsy reunion sex won't be clouded by emotions.
Randomize
