Nipple clamps can be ambiguous
If he comes back to you and I'm left alone in lonelytown I'm totally going to poo on your car.
I wish there was some sort of "recently added" function for blackberrys so i could see what random numbers i got from the night before
Jenna and Ryan are ranting and raving about child custody. MY VASECTOMY SMILES.
They're like penises that have been put in a blender.
I have no idea. Next thing I know we're all down on one knee saying the pledge of allegiance and then singing I'm Proud to be an American. Then Trevor ate pizza off the sidewalk.
Only your wife would write 'for deposit only' on the back of that $1500 check knowing full and well our capabilities of spending it on strippers and booze
It's like the sisterhood of the traveling vaginas over here
This american gymnastics guy.... He just messed up. I feel so bad. I just wanna hug him until he stops crying. Not even in a sexual way. I just wanna hug him.
Any time you've had a failed relationship, I blast No Sex for Ben by The Rapture and dance around my room. I wish I was joking.
Why can't all sociopaths be as fabulous as me?
Just because you are home alone for the weekend doesn't mean you can act like a nudist.
I accept your opinion but respectfully disagree. Also, I'm sitting in your chair.
I'm fucking camped out by the bathrooms. I think the poopatrator is in there. Wtf is my life
Almost an end to the saga.
My professor just told my lab he could drive us around town in his 1991 Lincoln towncar limo for our bar crawl. This just keeps getting better!
It’s like I’m living in some alternate wet dream universe right now
Randomize
