And mexicans. My burrito likes you.
Hoooooo maaaaan
Yes?
I'm retarded. Again.
Apparently she held up my head the entire 40 minutes, convincing the cab driver that I was okay
No one even knew you were hurt until we saw the multiple cuts to prove it, and when we asked what happened all you could say was "I fell out"
5am update: in a toga seeing triple made out with both sexes
Only the gays. Guy gives me a handjob in the steam, then changes next to me under his towel
Only the gays
We fucked then made friendship bracelets, his mother taught him right!
And now for everyone's least favorite sport... Drunk babysitting.
Do you remember lying across two tables saying 'go away I'm trying to pull' to me, Sollie and Sean?
I told him we could use my stove to make weed brownies, from that point on he kept reffering to me as "best pledge ever"
You'll be like the drunk Paul Bunyan someday with a giant grey cat
Glass of stolen champagne in a to go cup = tastiest hangover cure ever
I got sprayed in the face with titty milk and I'm still so traumatized
The assignment was about the Industrial Revolution so I just screamed at them in a British accent all day. No, they didn't know I was hungover.
You should of known that i was high if i refer to myself as melting into anything
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