I am about to be in my happy place. (the shower with a 6 pack)
THEY SHOULD WARN YOU WHEN THEY MAKE JELLO SHOTS WITH JACK DANIELS!!! THEY SHOULD WARN YOU!!!!!!!
What's the kids name that was drinking stale beer and redbull out of the blender?
I don't remember anything other than how good it felt when I peed my pants.
A 300 lb dude in a sundress yelling bible verses while wearing a raggedy anne wig is just as funny as I thought it would be. Thank you san francisco.
I always knew I'd be the first one with an STD
LEAVE MY LITTLE DICK OUT OF THIS
I told him he was, quote: "A big cuddly bear" and he needed to get into my bed or I would set his Golden Retriever free.
I miss the "How many Grindr hits can I get while performing in an elementary school?" game.
The low-flow toilet at my office cannot handle the intensity of this hangover.
Do you think next time you could control the yawn? Kind of a buzzkill to be mid-orgasm and see you yawning over there.
Is there a lightning bolt coming out of your boner right now?!
At least you didn't lose your virginity to chumbawumba
it was weird going down on him. His picture of Jesus was staring at me the entire time...
You sent me a pic of you peeing in two separate directions
and like half a dozen dick pics
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