Dude, I couldnt get it up cause she said her parents were home...
ok, come over...I have doritos
Cuntadactyl. (n). A pre-historic dinosaur of Mandy-like features that is primarily identified by it's inability to play well with others and overall C-word demeanor. Physically, an unfortunate appearance.
is it bad if I use the term bowl as a measurement of time, as in how long it takes to smoke a bowl?
She has no definite jawline and all of her photo's have Ke$ha quotes as captions followed by a "<3" Even by your standards that is embarrassing.
This guy kept running around with a blender giving people shots of everclear and vodka. Best. Toga. Party. Ever.
Jsyk, in serious talks of trading blowjobs for soup in bed. I'm sober
He burnt his arm on the grill, then turned around and started blaming it on the burger buns...I think it's safe to say he's drunk.
its one thing to be single and another thing to be single and then have your profile picture be of you and the cat
your picture is with misty too!!
I AM SINGLE BY CHOICE
Oooo yea. You face planted on my bed but only half your body made it so you noodled onto the floor but kept saying prepare to be murdered which is when you started taking your pants off but stopped at your ankles cause it was too hard
I feel like you're the reason public nudity is illegal and generally frowned upon in society
"Like what guy would respond to 'let's fuck. I've got bagels'??"
But of course I'm in. After all, what fun would the holidays be without trying to find the perfect gift to impress someone you've never met, but need the approval of??
What can i say, my face is nice and my body is just unreal. And my beer pouring/stealing is incredible \n
I currently hiding in an upside down garbage can please come find me
Awesome. I did a rain go away dance. And it went away. Nbd just cotrollin the weather with my mind and sweet dance moves
Randomize