That cute girl I hooked up with last night clawed my back to hell and gave me a hickey. I look like a white trash warewolf victim
Why the fuck do they always fuck on couches in porn?
Don't ever text me while you're jacking off. EVER.
something came early last nite... and lemme tell u it wasn't christmas...
finally achieved: got laid in the religion section of borders. thought you should know.
Hey girl, do you remember you made me brush your hair with a plastic fork on Saturday night?
We've cranked the heat for blizzard versions of all of our strip games. Come over.
I'm pretty sure I have enough material at this point to start a blog called Guys I've Banged in Pictures together. Why does this keep happening to me!
I wish I'd realized he looked like Skrillex before I was already in the middle of fucking him...
We're making a scrapbook of dick pics, you want in or what?
Her 4ft mother helped 5ft10 passed out me from the car to my girlfriend's bed at 1am...with whopper in hand
hahahaha classic. this is why you are going to a college with a hospital right next to it
if it makes u feel better, i skipped class so i could go to a sex convention in jersey a few hours earlier than if i went to class.
This conversation went from me banging other women's husbands to learning about baked goods. If that isn't personal growth I don't know what is.
Woke up with a $100 bill from the Philippines in my bra & an unopened box of sour patch kids next to me. I have some questions.
BRB. These cougars are squabbling over my junk and one of them is offering to pay my tuition
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