Operation extremely regretful is in full effect
I should have been more specific when I asked for 8 inches.
normally i would apologize for my drunk texting but even sober me agrees.
New development. Drinking at work is so easy and awesome I might have to do it everyday.
Hey since its national brother week is that eiffel tower option with your girlfriend still on the table?
Oh and someone pissed in my shoes, so I'll let you figure that out.
After 7 months of nothing.. shall we throw your vagina a party? as its reinstatement into society?
Had to drive my booty call home because he had an asthma attack after we had sex .. How was your night?
I just watched my ex butt chug a quart of eggnog. Why did I dump her again?
Clearly you need to take sleeping pills and put your phone in the toilet
When I told her I was deaf and took my hearing aids out at night to sleep, she said it must be nice not having to hear drunken roommates having awkward sex late at night.
Still drunk, heading to class.
It's 3 a.m. Dude
Doesn't mean I'm not at my desk. Ill wait.
when i saw him today i think my vagina did the equivalent of a stomach growl... its been to long
I feel like you're encouraging me to commit a felony.
I feel like you're wasting time.
So...I'm pretty sure I have officially determined that reverse cowgirl is the only position possible to have sex in my smart four two
Randomize
