ok, i just want to know who did it and which end it came out of
areolas are like halos for boobs.
Just picture a bunch of Abraham Lincolns having an orgy.
Of course... Double fistin nati light cuz the powers out and it cuts down the times i gotta open the fridge... Genius
Wonderful brian is stoned out of his mind, floating in a lawn chair in the hot tub eating a giant plate of macaroni and staring at the moon
He said the last thing he remembered thinking was: 'Why is this vagina spinning?' Too drunk sex is no ones friend.
I'm sorry but if you can't drink a bottle of wine without a glass, I do not think we can be friends.
Judging by your snapchat you're totally working on your project and definitely not singing, "The Sign" while shirtless with another man.
I am literally drinking 7 day old water and looking for snacks in my room so I won't have to go in the hall and see roommate, because we accidentally banged last night. Please bring over some chicken and plan b.
I've sold more douches working here than one man should sell in a lifetime
And on the 323rd day without sex, God finally said let there be light...or love?
EMERGENCY SUBJECT CHANGE. SHE DOESN'T KNOW.
Just do what I do and listen to your vagina. She’ll growl when she smells good dick
I went with vodka instead of tequila tonight so I make better decisions. Fool proof plan.
Let me call you later. I’m lining up some office dick now that working at home is ending
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